TRINITY UNITED CHURCH
WEDDING POLICY AND MARRIAGE PROCEDURE
MARRIAGE POLICY
In the Christian church, marriage vows are made before God in the context of worship. The marriage service celebrates married love. Christian marriage involves the life-long commitment of two people who will share their lives and love and who ask the blessing of God on their union.
Trinity United Church celebrates the marriage of members, adherents or people otherwise connected to this congregation, regardless of race, physical ability or sexual orientation.
This wedding policy has been set in place by the Church Council of Trinity United Church.
WEDDING PROCEDURE
We rejoice in your commitment to each other! Trinity offers the resources of this congregation to you as you prepare to establish that commitment within the covenant of Christian Marriage.Trinity will endeavour to be sensitive to and respectful of other faith traditions when one of the partners is from outside the church. Trinity, however, is a Christian congregation and this will be reflected in the service offered.
Arranging a Date
Many items need attention, not the least of which is the reserving of the sanctuary (seats 500) or the memorial chapel (seats 80). We require at least three months notice for summer weddings, (6 months or more is better), and at least two months at other times. Weddings are booked on a first come – first served basis. Be sure to consult with the minister before setting the day and time of your wedding and reception, as well as the Rehearsal time.
Invited Clergy
Trinity United Church recognizes that you may have a clergy person that has had a special influence in your life. We are happy to include that person. The decision to invite the guest clergy, however, must first be discussed with the minister at Trinity United Church. Please present the name to the minister and contact information and the minister will extend the invitation.
Marriage Preparation
Marriage is much more than a wedding, so you will be encouraged to participate in a marriage preparation program. The minister will give you more information about this during your first interview. There is a Preparation for Marriage workshop given at Kitchener Interfaith Counselling Centre and another through the United Church of Canada.
Medical Examination
Both of you ought to have a thorough medical check-up before marriage. If you have not yet as a couple made decisions about contraception and family planning, this is an opportunity to do so.
Money and Things
Both of you should make a Will and consider a pre-nuptial agreement. You should consider financial responsibilities, bank accounts and pension beneficiaries.
License
You must obtain a marriage license at City Hall. There are timelines indicated that must be observed. No license, no wedding. Although the Marriage act of Ontario allows a couple to purchase a marriage license and get married on the same day, we ask you to get the license at least one week before and bring the license to the Church Office as soon as possible. This allows our Secretary to prepare the certificates, etc. The Marriage Act also says that a license expires after three months. So don’t get it too early!
Witnesses
The law requires that in addition to yourselves and the minister there must be a minimum of two credible witnesses (aged 18 or over) at your wedding.
Music
Our Director of Music Ministries plays at weddings where music is desired. After you
have met with the minister, make an appointment with the Director of Music Ministries. He, too, is a professional and will advise you about what is suitable and possible in wedding music. Remember that everything that is played or sung, like all that is said or read, must be appropriate to a religious ceremony. Popular pieces, such as love songs from films and musicals, which extol human affection without a central reference to God, are not suitable.
You might consider them for your reception. If you wish a soloist, the Director of Music Ministries will be happy to recommend one to you.
While we understand that you may have a musician in your life who is special to you and you may want to have that person included in the wedding, it is the policy of our church that the person being requested be cleared, (before invitation) by the Director of Music Ministries as having the gifts and skills to operate the equipment. The Director of Music Ministries’ fee is still payable even if another musician has been approved to play the service.
Sexton
Our sexton, as a necessary part of our team, is required to be on duty at any wedding where there are guests. He appreciates being consulted about arrangements (flowers, bows, etc) two or three weeks prior to the wedding.
Flowers and Candles
You may provide your own flowers or engage a florist. Be sure to confirm delivery time to ensure that someone will be at the church to receive them. Simple arrangements are the most effective. Stands are also available. We ask that flowers not be placed on the Communion Table. It is appropriate to leave some or all of your flowers for the Sunday service. Please let the Church Office know if you plan to do this.
If you wish to use candles, please discuss this with the Sexton. Only dripless candles of the proper size should be used. These can be purchased through the Church Office.
If you wish to use pew bows, you must provide them. They must not be fastened with nails or tacks. Please speak with the Sexton before you begin.
Photographs
Photographs may be taken of the wedding party in the Narthex before the processional, of the processional, of the signing of the register, and of the recessional but not during the ceremony. In the Welcome (and in your bulletin) we will ask your guests to set aside their cameras and enter into the meaning of the moment.
A professional photographer may take flashless pictures from the balcony during the service. Some couples arrange to return for “posed” pictures following the recessional. In any case your “official” photographer should check with the minister ahead of time.
Videos
Videotaping of the entire service can be done discreetly (i.e., using available light only) from the balcony. Make arrangements with the minister ahead of time.
Rehearsal
Generally the rehearsal takes place the evening before the wedding and requires 45-60 minutes. The couple, their parents and their attendants and the Readers should be present. Please be punctual and be prepared to introduce your families and guests to the minister.
Time To Arrive For The Wedding
Ushers should arrive 30 – 40 minutes prior to the ceremony. The wedding party and parents should arrive 20 minutes prior to the ceremony.
The wedding party will be met and taken to their prearranged rooms. From there the sexton will then organize the procession to begin on time.
Confetti
We ask that confetti not be used inside OR outside the Church. It has a habit of walking back into the sanctuary and causes nightmares for the sexton. If this guideline is not adhered to, there will be an additional cleanup fee charged to you.
Parking
Up to six cars of the immediate wedding party may park on Frederick Street outside the church. The Church Office arranges with the city’s Parking Authority for special permission. The easiest place for guest parking is in the lot across the street from the church or in the Market Square parking garage located diagonally across from the church.
FEES
Church fees – If you attend Trinity United Church regularly there is no charge for the use of the sanctuary or the memorial chapel.
If you do not contribute to the church’s upkeep, there is a fee of $125.00 for the sanctuary and $100.00 for the chapel.
The Director of Music Ministries fee is $175.00. For weddings in which there is a vocal or an instrumental soloist requiring accompaniment, the Director of Music Ministries’ fee is $225.00.
The Sexton’s fee is $125.00.
The Minister’s fee is $250.00.
All fees should be placed in separate marked envelopes and brought to the rehearsal
Director of Music Ministries
Sexton
Ministers – Rev. Jack Paleczny
- Rev. Desmond Jagger-Parsons
As we noted at the beginning …
We are welcoming you to make your marriage vows before God in the context of worship. This has certain implications. Obviously, you are not renting the church or its staff for your wedding. Trinity’s sanctuary and chapel are houses of worship. When we gather there your family and friends for this wonderful celebration of married love we are all participating in a service of worship to the God of love.
Along with respect for the church and its staff, other simple courtesies would include: ensuring that members of your wedding party arrive on time for the rehearsal; introducing your parents and attendants to the minister; and attention to details in this leaflet, including its paragraph about fees.
